


Goodbyes

by History_Fanatic



Category: Historical RPF
Genre: RPF, anastasia nikolaevna, this can be read as a Anastasia broadway fic if you want, this was my first fanfic so it's pretty crappy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 10:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17242955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/History_Fanatic/pseuds/History_Fanatic
Summary: The year is 1918 and Nicholas, Alexandra and Maria are leaving for Yekaterinburg while Olga, Tatiana and Anastasia are staying with an ill Alexei. Maria and Anastasia struggle to say goodbye.Characters: Maria Nikolaevna, Anastasia Nikolaevna and the rest of the family [mentioned]This can be read as a Anastasia Broadway fanfic if you want to (although it was written as a real Romanov fanfic). For Anastasia’s letter there are many direct quotes from the real Anastasia’s letters.





	Goodbyes

**Author's Note:**

> This can be read as a Anastasia Broadway fanfic if you want to (although it was written as a real Romanov fanfic). For Anastasia’s letter there are many direct quotes from the real Anastasia’s letters. I’ve put lines that are quotes in italics. I’ve also included pictures of what the little pair would look like at this point at the end
> 
> This was my first fanfic (I wrote it a while ago) so it's pretty crappy. It's also pretty short

Maria Nikolaevna’s diary entry, 1918 [before leaving for Yekaterinburg]

I had already said my goodbyes to the others. Now it was just Anastasia who was left. How can I say goodbye to my Nastya? I approached her with tears already streaming down my cheeks from saying my goodbyes to my other dear siblings. Anastasia rushed up and hugged me. She held on to me so tightly I thought that she would suffocate me. My dear Anastasia was sobbing into my shoulder. I know she had wanted to try not to cry but even she could not hold her tears back at such a sad event. I buried my head into her neck as I too sobbed. One hand tightly held her hand while the other stroked her light brown hair, which will no doubt soon be at shoulder length. 

“Please don’t cry my precious Shvybzik. We shall be together again very soon.” I whispered into her ear. Anastasia sniffled, obviously trying to stop crying, and pulled back a little. “Don’t say that you fool. Look at the state you’re in. You’ll sound and look like a hypocrite.”. Tears were still streaming down her lovely face but her sobbing had mostly subsided. I lightly laughed at her attempt to still be humorous at such a time. I brought my other hand, that had previously been holding her hand, up to her face. I stared at my darling sister as I tried to think of what to say. There was so many things I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell her how I would miss her, how much I love her but I just couldn’t put such immense feelings into words. “There’s no need to say anything Mashka. I understand.” Anastasia smiled at me as she looked into my eyes. She reached up to her face and held my hands as she tried to stop anymore tears from leaving her eyes. 

“Christ be with you, my precious Nastya.”

“You too, my dear sister."

Maria Nikolaevna’s diary entry, 1918 [a week later]

My legs feel as if they are going fall off. I am so physically and emotionally drained! The guards here are so terribly rude to us. Nothing like how our previous guards at Tobolsk were. We were ordered to open all of our luggage and when Papa defended dear Mama for objecting the horrible man said that refusal to comply with such requests would result in harsh punishment. 

We are all so frightened. I did not tell Papa and Mama, as I do not wish to trouble them further, but I cried myself to sleep last night. I had to bed very quiet so I didn't wake Nyuta up. Mama is so stressed. In an empty page of her diary she kept scrawling swastikas for good luck. Mama is so worried that she’s advised me to be careful what I write in my diary as we don’t know if they should request to read it. Perhaps I will burn or hide this one like me and Anastasia did with our others. That might put Mama at ease. Anastasia’s letter arrived today. She sounded so terribly sweet in it. I found myself re reading the letter numerous times while imagining she was here beside me. Oh how I do miss her……

As lovely as her letter was I do hope that I will soon receive other letters from my other siblings. I would so like a letter from Alexei, even if it is in Olga’s handwriting, and the big pair. In the letter Anastasia briefly mentioned that Olga looked rather thin and pale. Oh! i do hope there is nothing wrong with my dear Olya [Olga]. She has been so mopey since we were arrested. Before I left for Yekaterinburg we were looking through old photograph albums. All was fine until she looked at a picture of her and her dear Mitya. She looked as if she was in rather low spirits after that..

I will end today’s entry now. I have never liked writing in my diary, as I always found it rather boring, but this past week I’ve grown to liking it more than I did before. It sometimes distracts me from what is currently happening.

Reminder: Write to Tatiana tomorrow asking if she can give anymore insight on Olga and Alexei’s conditions.

Anastasia’s letter to Maria 

My dear Mashka, darling 

I am so sorry for forgetting to write to you! Please forgive me for my awful handwriting, I’m just being stupid. It is all rather boring without you here. Tatiana spends every waking minute with Alexei. She helps him eat, reads him books and makes sure he is not lonely. Me and Olga spend a great deal of time with him too but certainly not as much as Tatiana. 

********

__We played on the swing yesterday which was very fun. I was swinging when I fell, rather ungracefully, on my bottom. I told the sisters about it so many times that they got quite fed up, but I could go on telling it masses of times, only there’s no one left to tell it too.__

********

___My little Jim [her dog] seems to be much better than how he was last week. He still has a cold but he’s stopped sneezing now. I wish to play with him but Tatiana said “That’s probably not the best idea Nastya. He needs rest.”. What a bore! Oh well, at least I will get to play with Jimmy when he’s better. An hour ago I was playing with Ortipo [Tatiana’s dog] which was very fun until she got tired. She’s been so terribly lazy recently and is almost always lying on Tatiana’s lap. Joy [Alexei’s dog] is always beside Alexei’s bed almost as if she’s keeping guard. The weather here was very nice up until today. It was very warm so we, when not with Alexei, spent much of our time outside. Strangely enough I got more sunburnt than the others, like a real Arrrab! But now it’s rather cold. Dear Olishka [Olga] has been getting very thin and pale. Tatiana worries a great deal for her. I hope she feels better soon although I doubt it’s anything too serious___

********

___I’ve been getting rather fat lately. Soon I might be as heavy as you were! Remember when we called you fat little bow-wow? Olga says that we can’t really call you that anymore as you aren’t as plump as you were before your illness but I don’t care. You’ll always be my dear fat Maria. I hope you will write back to me very soon. Us three long for news about Mama and Papa, and of course yourself. Alexei is far too tired and ill to worry too much but when he is awake he often asks us when you and our dear parents shall be back. _I want to see you so much it’s depressing. I went out for a walk, but now I’ve come back, I’m sad and walking doesn’t help. The sun has come out again but it’s still terribly cold and my hand can barely write. I must end my letter now. Tatiana’s looking at me from across the room as if she wishes to speak to me. I’ve told her that I’m nearly finished so she’s sat down with Ortipo on her lap.___ _

********

____Christ be with you, my golden ones. I embrace you all and kiss not three, but masses of times.__ _ _

********

**Author's Note:**

> Here are three pictures of what the little pair look like at this point. 1 (https://66.media.tumblr.com/be00721476ec1e60cb307db481099061/tumblr_inline_phvqdiC7IB1vlq34h_540.jpg) is Anastasia, Maria and Tatiana in 1917.   
> 2 (https://66.media.tumblr.com/fa0989b2765ef628068879faaf81d4d4/tumblr_inline_phvqbxjfYg1vlq34h_540.jpg) is Maria and Anastasia in 1917.   
> 3 (https://66.media.tumblr.com/7e07cffc7fe2ce60af9f45850b299b26/tumblr_inline_phvqdwIGld1vlq34h_540.jpg) is Anastasia in 1918.
> 
> Here are the real quotes from Anastasia's letter to Maria that I used: "Please forgive me for my awful handwriting, I’m just being stupid.", "I told the sisters about it so many times that they got quite fed up, but I could go on telling it masses of times, only there’s no one left to tell it too.", "I want to see you so much it’s depressing. I went out for a walk, but now I’ve come back, I’m sad and walking doesn’t help." and "Christ be with you, my golden ones. I embrace you all and kiss not three, but masses of times."


End file.
